Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty.

Tonight, after A does a half shift at the show, we (and the cat) are loading up a rental car and driving to PA to his parents’ house. Why? Well, first of all, to see them. And why else?

I’m turning 24 on Monday.

My birthday last year was one of the first days I spoke for a while with A:

B: Birthday was fun. I celebrated all week, because, well, why not. The actual day, my friends were “doing” things, so I took a train up the Hudson and fell asleep in a cemetery in the sun. In other words, it was great.

A: You’re pretty freakin’ awesome. When I was in high school, my friends and I used to have what we called “Tuesdays with A,” where, when the weather got warm, after school, we would go out and get some ice cream, and then go to a cemetery. Nothin’ better than four straight guys just eating ice cream cones sprawled out on a cemetery lawn. Good times.
So I’m sure a birthday in a cemetery would just be great. Plus, you get the whole another year older, another year closer to death thing going on, so that’s neat.

B: Cemeteries are ideal locales for nerding out about history and inventing really tragic cholera outbreaks and family murders and local battles and mining accidents. Plus there’s always the perfect sun-to-shade ratio.

So… it’s a good thing, and this year can only be better than last year, when I was completely alone. So we’ll be with his folks Sat-Sun, and then we’ll do something fun for the day itself. I think we’ll go to Harper’s Ferry and Antietam; do the whole fun Civil War history thing, hike a little, walk around a town or two, have dinner, go home.

When I’m back… I don’t know. Life opens up a bit. At least it will in theory. A still works every night, and I still work every day. But there’s space, and there’s some kind of comfort in the certainty of a show in July/August. There’s some anxiety about having to turn down the other company I’ve been working with, if that show is accepted to the Fringe. I already feel guilty about missing rehearsal this week, and we should get the Fringe letter, so… I don’t like disappointing people.

I guess I should be mindful, in the next month or so, of only going to the EPAs that don’t conflict with summer. Because even though I’d take something with a higher profile or salary over the July/August show, it’s not really worth it to get up early and waste my time at open equity auditions when I have something just darn fine in its place.

I’m getting new headshots on May 7. I’m nervous, because I’m not so good with getting my picture taken, but I really like the photographer and I trust him and his team to take good care of me. Plus my hair looks really good right now, I bleached my eyebrows slightly (as my agent told me too) so they’re not so dark and match my golden tresses (ew) better. Plus I’m just about where I want to be weight-wise, and that isn’t nothing.

Today I went to an audition appointment for a staged reading at Joe’s Pub (a concert venue connected to the Public Theatre). It’s really a low-importance thing, stipend, no one famous, one night only, but the part is super super super good, and having Joe’s Pub as a credit is super recognizable. I went in for my audition and did the opening monologue. I finished, and they just looked at me. In my mind, I was like, “Uh… am I done? Why are you looking at me?” but then the CD started to give me some adjustments, and the playwright jumped in with, “Yes. Yes, that was it. You’re great, you’re a star. Now put some of that lightness and positivity that I see in YOU into the monologue.” So I did it again.

Basically, I fucking nailed it. Not to jinx or anything, but it went really well. So. I’ll let you know on that front.

And now, sort of in honor of Gray-Eyed Athena‘s beautiful “coming out” post, I’m coming out. Sorta. I can’t come all the way out here because of my career– you all can know who I am, but I can’t be google-able. 🙂 Anyhow, probably what I am the worst at and what gives me the most anxiety is singing. I love singing, but I’m not good, and living somewhere like NYC and working in the theatre is not really a self-esteem booster for a not-really-great singer.

But, I recorded myself singing a song. And I’m linking to it here. You don’t have to listen, and the quality is really shitty, but there. It’s a small coming out.

The song is from MATILDA, which I saw about a month ago in previews and loved. If you’re in NYC or London, that’s really what you should be seeing. This is probably the second song in the show, sung by Matilda. It’s obviously not a part I would ever play (since I am no longer 10 years old), so it’s sorta more fun.

Anyway.

Enjoy your weekends.

xoxo, B.

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2 thoughts on “Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty.

  1. You are awesome 🙂 And your voice is so beautiful!!! You sound quirky, and cheerful, and poised. I hope we get the privilege of hearing you more and more!! Congratulations on coming out. xoxo, g.

  2. I. LOVE. THIS.
    You are very talented (and I LOVE Matylda. And Eloise for that matter. )

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